12 June 2014

Fun With Spam!

Image found here
Okay, so perhaps I'm stretching it a bit too far here, but I've never done one of those posts that talks about the statistics on my blog hits, or the curious terms people type into search engines that lead to my blog.  Seems like the blogosphere was all a-buzz with posts like that a couple of years ago. But the other day I got the most bizarre spam comment and thought it was too funny not to share. 

Most spam that I get has a few key search words included for whatever product it's pushing: shoes, enhancement pills, medical marijuana, etc. You know, the words that search engine optimization (SEO) has dictated would be best.  But this one?  It's ALL over the place.  This spammer wants to promote fashion and health and sex and performance and goodness knows what else:

"the reasons for being bouncing, umpteen family line subscribed. witness daring slipway to prevent search too "fancy." Buy a seed submarine, and buy multiples of it. You don't requirement their currency when purchasing an component part. mostly, you ordain be feat the incomparable products that youthat knowledge trades without emotion Michael Kors Bags; , assertable if your kid a fiddling sonorous for just about excellent online-buying advice you can crumble those for a base security interest loan. This is one of the chemical, such as its bearing expands. If you've successful online are passably unwashed-judgement poppycock. roughly of these styles in either the subjugate on World Book Night: Givin' All Night Long!"

It's almost poetic, really.  Submarine? Sonorous? Unwashed judgement poppycock?  I kinda want to know the person who threw these words together.  In some ways it reminds me of Dumbledore: "Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!"

What about y'all? Have you had a spam comment that was so fun or bizarre that it was worth commenting on?

12 comments:

  1. You have a much better sense of humor than I do Emily! When those garbled spam comments come in I tend to groan. I think I'll try to find the humor next time. Spam Spam Spam Spam So funny!

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    1. I happen to love the absurd, so this really appealed to me. :)

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  2. LMAO. Oh man, I never get good (so horrible it's hilarious) spam like this! Is it weird that I'm a little jealous? Just a tad?

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  3. I have recently been getting ridiculous spam as well! Although yours wins. Mine are ridiculous but have a clear focus (Cast spells to win love/get money/punish your enemies). That was wonderful. Thank you for sharing!

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    1. Yes, unfocused spam is clearly superior to the focused kind.

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  4. UGH, it seems Blogger ate my comment. Anyway,LOL, it looks like a spam bot through this together. I don't think a person can write such a mess or even google translate mess up so much even if translating from some obscure language. And yes, I did get something similar once or twice, too.

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    1. Boo! I'm sad to hear that you think it's a spambot and not a real person who threw those random words together.

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  5. This comment is really a prose poem. It might even be publishable!

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    1. I think it would be a great jumping-off point for creating a book of poetry. Each poem title could be a word or phrase from it: "Seed Submarine," "Unwashed Judgment," and "Fiddling Sonorous."

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  6. You know, that is an idea some publisher would probably go for! If you could just convince some big name poets to participate, I think you could sell a collection of poems based on comments from spambots.

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  7. I haven't received any funny spam for awhile, although my favourite was about pizza and how it can unite people and the world in love. Yours however, that is art. Plain and simple.

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Please, sir, may I have some more? (Comments, that is!)